Dealing with reading
I never thought that I would read this much in such little time. I had a dreamed about it and It was all I could think about as I entered the room. I've never really liked reading books nor writing for that fact. I just could never force myself to sit down for an hour or two and read a book that I didn't find interesting in the slightest. This was my life growing up, I was always told or pushed by either my father or teachers on what to do. This is why I hated reading. I almost always found a way to around having to read. I remember sitting in class in middle school looking at all the students read the books that the teacher let us pick out from the shelves of books. I remember sitting down making it look like I was reading when what I was really doing was watching the other students mouth the words of the book. I remember always asking myself “ what the hell do they find interesting in these damn books”. Around the 8th grade I found websites that analyzed pieces of literature and gave the key points of the stories. Websites like this is what kept me from failing a lot of my english classes. This process began to fail when I attended High School.
Before entering high school I was petrified of it because of all the things past students of my middle school said about it. In short they made high school sound like college. Shortly into freshman year I found out that what they said was not true. The teachers do cared about your thoughts and they were nice. I got assigned the very first book I found interesting The House on Mango street. Another plus is that I got to make friends with very nice people. One of my close friends who I met in freshman year of high school used to go down to the school library where we would hang out. He introduced me to anime series such as One Piece and Bleach. But these books weren’t what teachers wanted students for school. I started to enjoy till I was introduced Critical Lens essays. Boy, did I hate this. Not reading the books that I should have put me in a situation in which I was unable to complete my assignments and was facing failing 9th grade english.
The only reading I did in school was the time I spent in the school library during lunch even though they didn't help me much but it did help me deal with the issue of sitting down for an hour or two of reading. I didn't have to do this much in my sophomore year because the reading were enjoyable and overall very interesting. 11th grade is where the challenges began, where everything got boring again I just couldn't take it anymore and resorted back to my old ways. When the regents came around I learned that my old habits were not paying off. All the books that I should have read and didn't would have been helpful for me during the regents because I had to do something that I haven’t done it in a long time, A critical lens essay. When I reached that part of the exam, naturally I was able to complete the first paragraph which was my own understanding and interpretation of the quote, but that was as far as 9I could get. after that point I struggled to remember what I had read from class. My palms got sweaty, I looked around nervously for a spark of ingenuity but nothing. I remember asking myself, what parts of the books connected to my interpretation of the quote? After spending what felt like 2 hours on the exam. I handed in my paper and i walked out hoping that I passed but knowing that I had failed.
The last day of school came and all students were handed their report cards. I looked over my shoulder in the my homeroom class looking at all the students happily trading report cards to compare it to theirs. I remember the happy faces of students who thought they failed their classes but passed. It was like time slowed down and my unsettling mood got worse as I saw all others students happy. In all my report card was good. I had good grades in all my classes and i knew that my parents would be proud. When I looked at the exam back bowed my head in shame ready to see the failing grade. BUT I PASSED. When I got home later that day my mother yanked to report card out of my hand she was happy that I did well in my classes and was surprised to see that i had a low grade for the English exam. She handed me the house phone and I was a bit puzzled until I said hello and my father immediately told me to read the report card to him over the phone. When i got to the exam I had gotten a low grade on I hesitated to speak. he said Is that all, i replied no and told him that I got a 69 on the English exam. He asked me to explain to him what made me get the grade. I told everything about using websites to learn about the books assigned by teachers in order to avoid having to actually read them.h told me that I had to retake the exam because it would affect me being accepted to any college.
That following summer leading into the first semester of twelve grade I started to read all the books that I needed to read. In twelve grade English I learned how to properly take notes on a book and this helped me a lot. The day of the exam I questioned whether I could remember what I read or will I just forget it and repeat what happened to me. As entered the room I was scared and worried about what would happen when I reached the part of the test that lower my grade the first time. When I reached the Critical lens essay I started to write and write. Remembering the books were not hard for me. I left the feeling confident and that I passed with a very high grade. I was wrong my grade only 6 points.
Even though I didn't score a very high grade I learned several things. The first being that those sites weren't as helpful as I thought it might be when it came to the state exam. The second being that, sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.
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